The unfortunate circumstances that led me to pen "No Help" are lost to me in the quicksand of memory now. It was a rather chronic condition for me, though, in the late 80s, when I wrote it. It's wild exaggeration, of course, as I've never been close to homeless. At one point, I was prepared to live in my car, but I moved back into my parents' basement instead.
I was trying for a kind of "Biko" like sound on the song. There's likely no good reason for me to like this one as much as I do. (No one else ever has. Didn't even make the Top 100 downloads from the site.) My favorite part is the coda where it goes, "…Never mind/ I don't need your help anymore…" after spending the whole last five minutes begging for help. It's almost a practical joke, but then you think a minute and it gets ominous. Or maybe--in taking Wilson Philips' advice--the narrator holds on for one more day and things go his way?
lyrics
"No Help"
[vonHummer]
Why why why why WHY won’t you help me? You’re no help at all.
Why do you sneak out the back every time I call?
Give me a boost, please, lend me a dime, I won’t forget you when it comes your time,
Now is the time for you to come to my assistance and help me!
Why why why why WHY won’t you help me? You’re not helping here,
I rub so hard on your lamp, but you never appear,
Give me a break, a five dollar bill, I’ll pay you back with interest if you will,
I’m still a-waitin’ on a matron or a patron to help me!
Put your shield away and give me a blanket,
won’t you care for you fellow man?
Put your toys away and give me a band aid,
I’m not asking for the Marshall Plan, a job, a handshake, a milkshake or a piece of the land...
Why why why why WHY won’t you help me? You’re no help at all.
Why do you sneak out the back every time I call?
Give me a boost, please, lend me a dime, I won’t forget you when it comes your time,
Now is the time for you to come to my assistance and help me!
I said, “SHAZAAM!” Captain Marvel, can’t you read my t- shirt? It says: “Here I Am!!!” Don’t know what I need more,
your help or the wisdom finally to see why why why why WHY won’t you help me?
Come and help me, give in and help me, I implore...Oh never mind, I don’t need your help anymore...
credits
from Isoprolific,
released August 21, 2016
vonHummer: vocals and bass.
vonHummer is a Portland music/cable access legend whose career spanned from Fall of 2001 to Fall of 2011, during which he
recorded a hundred or so songs for use in his absurdist show (and feature film) and played only a handful of concerts. Currently retired, his work shines on for the ages. Or will he someday return...?...more
Long split up, but not forgotten. Some say the Winebirds functioned as an ersatz Fleetwood Mac, and that's more than fair, but to me, they functioned as a real-life Partridge Family. vonHummer
Continuing the rock tradition of talking about awkward, intimate minutiae and nerdy obsessions via mammoth guitar lines. Bandcamp Album of the Day Sep 12, 2017