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Hotel Oregon

from Hotel Oregon by vonHummer

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The Eagles' "Hotel California" was the inspiration for this one. I wanted to write a "Hotel" song about my state, Oregon. At the Hotel California, "...you can check out any time you like/but you can never leave..." But what, I wondered, was the case for Oregon? My conclusion: "...check in, check out, check in, check out..." You can leave the Hotel Oregon any time it's convenient or possible. Oregon is more like rehab than California's pleasure prison.

I feel a little bad that this song skews Oregon unfairly to the Portland/Eugene side of wackiness. Oregon is huge, but those two cities unfairly stain the rest of the state which is full of folk whose grit and stolid nature one would have to go to Texas to find the equal of. "Hotel Portland" would probably be more accurate, but whatever. I'm sure "Hotel California" is really more "Hotel Los Angeles."

In a trivial album, here's a really trivial piece of trivia: there's a missing verse to this song. In recording it, I unknowingly lost count of how many verses I'd played, and sure enough, when I went to record vocals, I found I'd come up short. I can't find them now, but it said something derogatory about the hotel detective. Probably being on the take, as Oregon has some of the most crooked politics I've seen since the District of Columbia!

lyrics

"Hotel Oregon"
[vonHummer]

Every room got a lovely view, always something deconstructive
to do, check in, check out, check in, check out,
(This aint California, son)
This is where you come to get away
from everyone who's anyone, no thank you, no welcome
to the Hotel Oregon...
See, the bell hops never hop at all, leave your room to give
room service a call, check in, check out, check in, check out,
work while your whistling's done,
This is where you come to get away from everyone who's
anyone, no thank you, no welcome to the Hotel Oregon...
Well the maids, they're straight outta Playboy, say hey, boy
they'll turn down your bed if they can, and the concierge aint
been seen in years with the money for the new ceiling fans...
Under my bed found a roll of cash, just enough for this month's
coffee and hash, check in, check out, check in, check out,
guess I'm a guest til it's gone,
This is where you come to get away from everyone who's anyone,
no thank you, no welcome to the Hotel Oregon...

credits

from Hotel Oregon, released April 16, 2005
vonHummer: guitar, vocals

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vonHummer Portland, Oregon

vonHummer is a Portland music/cable access legend whose career spanned from Fall of 2001 to Fall of 2011, during which he recorded a hundred or so songs for use in his absurdist show (and feature film) and played only a handful of concerts. Currently retired, his work shines on for the ages. Or will he someday return...? ... more

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