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Each and Every Woman

from Thebrosmad EP by Thebrosmad

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"Each and Every Woman" with its ridiculous swagger and classic rock beat adds to the embarrassment-of-song-wealth factor. An incredible list of famous lovers (Jean Kirkpatrick? Dr. Ruth??) is set to music. Best line: "I did Yoko Ono, and I didn't wanna."

lyrics

"Each and Every Woman" [vonHummer]

I've gone all the way with Marilyn McCoo/Jeane Kirkpatrick and Kathy Lee, too/I've gone all the way with Jessica Hahn,/My list of lovers just goes on and on/Nancy Reagan acted like a teenage girl/I been with each and every woman in the western world...in the western world/
I've gone all the way with Billie Jean King/Me and Heather Locklear had a serious thing/I've gone all the way with Cher and Madonna/I did Yoko Ono and I didn't wanna/Shirley Temple Black said I should call her "Shirl," I been with each and every woman in the western world...in the western world/
I don't mean to take away from what they achieve/but they gave me sex like you wouldn't believe/I wasn't trying hard to feather my cap/seems like every time was just a crazy mishap/
I've gone all the way with Goldie Hawn/I left Oprah Winfrey throbbin' on her front lawn/I've done Debra Winger and Andie MacDowell/I taught Barbra Streisand what it means to howl/I gave Whoopi Goldberg my necklace of pearl/I been with each and every woman in the western world...in the western world/
I was with your wife before your marriage improved/I been with your second cousin twice removed/I been with your sister and the girl next door/Guess I just got something that they all can't ignore/
I've gone all the way with Doctor Ruth/She can tell you truly that I'm telling the truth/Though their vows of silence never will be betrayed/I've had every Brady girl and Alice the maid/Urban, suburban, metropolitan, rural,/I been with each and every woman in the western world...

credits

from Thebrosmad EP, released June 1, 2010
vonHummer: bass, vocals
Sir Raleigh Grey: drums, background vocals

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about

vonHummer Portland, Oregon

vonHummer is a Portland music/cable access legend whose career spanned from Fall of 2001 to Fall of 2011, during which he recorded a hundred or so songs for use in his absurdist show (and feature film) and played only a handful of concerts. Currently retired, his work shines on for the ages. Or will he someday return...? ... more

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